What? Having 9 kids is more weird than being a lesbian?
Michael Kingsley thinks Antonin Scalia isn’t “normal” because he and his wife Maureen have nine children.
Kingsley is pushing back at those who say Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan might be a lesbian. But his argument shows us an amazing insight into the modern liberal mind:
Now that the sex lives of Supreme Court justices have become grist for commentators, we are finally free to discuss a question formerly only whispered about in the shadows: Why does Justice Antonin Scalia, by common consent the leading intellectual force on the Court, have nine children? Is this normal? Or should I say “normal,” as some people choose to define it? Can he represent the views of ordinary Americans when he practices such a minority lifestyle? After all, having nine children is far more unusual in this country than, say, being a lesbian.
Having large families of course was considered normal for centuries. But in a few quarters, more people would agree with Kingsley than they would agree with me. In fact, Kingsley’s question deserves to go on the next Gallup Poll. The results would be fascinating (and they might even be depressing.) The question is: Why would some Americans think having nine kids would be more abnormal than same-sex relations?
In the debate on same-sex ‘marriages,’ its supporters are quick to ask: “How is your marriage harmed if two gays get married?” (In fact, I saw this argument employed this morning in reaction to Souder’s infidelity.) And quite a few Americans feel allowing gays to get married wouldn’t adversely affect their marriage, so they go along with the idea. (Which is why gays use this argument. Of course, marriage is about raising the next generation not only your lifelong relationship.)
But many Americans do feel threatened when they see large families. Friends of mine who have six or more kids can recite chapter and verse of what rude and vulgar things people say to them about having a large family. “Are they all yours?” “Haven’t you heard of birth control?” And many other phrases that I can’t even repeat here. This ugly sneering rivals any of the antagonism received by gay couples.
So why would someone lash out at a large family when they wouldn’t even dream of ridiculing a gay couple? Because if you practice contraception and in general look at children more as a burden than a blessing, seeing a family with nine kids cross your path feels like an indictment of your decision. That gay couple hasn’t affected or harmed your marriage, but that large family has (at least it seems). Even if the parent of the large family is nothing but charming and friendly, the insults still pour in. If you have a large family, you need to have a thick skin. It’s a world upside down.
Tags: Children, Elena Kagan, family, Supreme Court
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27 Comments
I have been on the receiving end of rude comments from parents who have large families. I have four children. Here are some quotes from rude parents:
“Only four? That’s a good start, I guess.” (from a parent of 14)
and
“I have to know….are you contracepting?” (from a parent of 9)
I guess idiocy crosses all demographics.
“But many Americans do feel threatened when they see large families. Friends of mine who have six or more kids can recite chapter and verse of what rude and vulgar things people say to them about having a large family.”
It sounds like what you’re saying here, Joshua, is that couples with large families can relate to what it feels like to be a gay couple; people who have never met you judge you based on their _own_ belief systems, and feel that they have a right to an opinion about your family, and even a right to deride you.
“This ugly sneering rivals any of the antagonism received by gay couples.”
I have two responses to this.
1.) It’s not really a competition. We can criticize the antagonism directed at some people without feeling the need to establish that it’s “worse than” what other people experience.
2.) You cannot be serious. Do you really hold the belief that people with large families face antagonism that is on a par with gay people? Really? _Really?_
http://www.foxnews.com/us/2009/10/12/ny-police-gay-man-beaten-street-apparent-hate-crime/
(”Police say the two suspects taunted Price and yelled anti-gay slurs while he was in the store early Friday. They attacked him outside…”)
http://www1.wsvn.com/news/articles/local/MI78009/
(”Police search for man who attacked gay couple”)
http://www.opposingviews.com/i/man-who-hated-gays-pleads-guilty-to-decapitating-gay-teen
(”Man Who ‘Hated’ Gays Pleads Guilty to Decapitating Gay Teen”)
http://legacy.signonsandiego.com/news/metro/20060814-9999-1m14deaf.html
(”A deaf teenager was badly beaten last night by as many as 10 men because the attackers “didn’t like the way he looked at them,” authorities reported. “)
http://www.towleroad.com/2009/03/gay-couple-attacked-during-spring-break-weekend-on-oregon-coast.html
(”‘All of the sudden, someone asked if were gay, called us ‘fags,’ then started punching us,’ said Deal. “)
http://abclocal.go.com/wabc/story?section=news/local&id=6714788
(”Daniel Caldwell’s jaw’s wired shut , broken in two places and chin bone is shattered, and teeth kicked into his gums.”)
The reason that a family with nine children threatens the contraception crowd is because those nine are more apt to be prolife and have nine of their own. Expedentially, making society more pro-life and voting out the culture of death.
Does anyone really believe that there are more lesbians than there are large families?
Marv, there is no such thing as “gay” marriage. Marriage is a state involving a man and a woman who have become husband and wife. Anything else is an attempt to define something as if it were marriage. One cannot compare or insinuate that there is anything equal or even appropriate in efforts to equate Marriage with sexual relationships between people of the same sex.
As for Michael Kinsley, his attempt to provocative only showed him to be a jerk. So what else is new. He never did learn too much from Buckley.
Hey, great article. Glad someone brought this up… in this society, the sweet is called evil and the evil called sweet…. the liberals would have abortion on demand at any stage of pregnancy, forced birth control and the eventual goal is probably babies grown in test tubes… of course, only with their consent….
My father was the ninth of nine children, and I guess I should offer prayers of thanksgiving that none of my maternal lineage were lesbians!
Faith, I saw that segment. I think it was the same segment, anyway. Justice Scalia called it playing “Vatican roulette.” I told my Dad, one of 9 kids, that, and he laughed pretty hard. Mom, one of 14, found it rather crude. I continue to get a chuckle out of it.
